Are you so stressed out that you constantly lose it over the littlest things like a glass of spilled milk or a broken cup?
“Mom, why are you so mad?” Your 12-year-old may ask, only irritating you further.
But if you’re touchy all of the time, you’re modeling exactly what you don’t want your kids to be. If you react angrily to little things eventually your impressionable kids will react angrily to little things, too. Is that what you want? No. But it’s not all bad news.
While kids literally learn anger, the good news is, they learn calmness, too says Michelle Borba, early childhood expert and author.
Try remaining calm when mishaps and misbehaviors threaten to unsettle you in front of the kids, and especially when the kids get upset.
Here are other things you can do to be your best for your loved ones:
• Teach kids to talk about their feelings
Kids often don’t know how to express how they are feeling, so parents need to help them find the words. Say something like, “Let’s talk about all the words we can think of to describe what’s going on.” Also, when your child is angry, identify his feelings for him if you are there. Say, “It looks like you’re angry … What’s going on?” and then let him talk. Don’t interject with YOUR words. Just let him talk it out.
• Help him notice when things are going wrong
Teach your child how to recognize the warning signs of his emotions. Help him notice if he’s raising his voice, if his heart is pounding or if he’s starting to want to throw something. And let him know that when this happens it may be best for him to take a time out … like Mommy or Daddy does!